Dearest Papa

Dearesr PaPa,

Do you even miss me? I spend most of my days wishing all is well for…but I can’t seem to bring myself to finish that half truth.

I don’t wish you well I wish you hell.

You left me when I needed you. No, I take that back.

To be fair, you were never truly there. Just a shadow of what could be. Of what should be.

Dearest papa, do you know how much I have cried.

Bet you would care if I drowned in my tears at night.

I do try, I truly do, to wish you well in your days.

Watch me Daddy

It’s cold outside but I don’t care. 

Want to rip out my veins

Drain the blood you hate so much

Would you love me then daddy? 

It’s so very cold outside

Want me to die, daddy

Want me to throw away the life you regret so much

It’s cold outside

But I am burning up

Running from the past

I am always hurting, still

want me to leave, Daddy

Would that make everything ok

Go away to a place where you would never have to see my face

Would that bring a smile to your lips

Would you be able to do all the things I made you miss

Can you stand to see me burn

I threw away a life I never earned

Daddy, I’m not afraid anymore

I know you lied when you said I would always be your baby girl

I can’t sleep. It’s not to late to try though