Crush

  Having a crush is like being ripped into itty bitty tiny pieces and being fed to wolves who only way to play with your inards.
Basically…dull.

So imagine someone..this someone being me. Developing a crush on someone. Not just anyone though. Oh no no no , that would make life to easy. No, a person who is by law unattainable.  I don’t mean illegal! I mean someone who is so far above me in status that the mere likes of me would burn up with just a simple glance from them.
Life sucks that way.

I do not mean to say I am UNATTRACTIVE unworthy.  No, I am just shy. Yes…shy.
To shy to look at them. To shy to do anything but ponder about how life could be if I could just ~sigh~ hold them.
I don’t want anything more then for them to call me theres. For us to sit back and read a good book or two, as the day passes us by.
I would love to go in the sun and dance in the flowers. I long to sit in the rain and watch the patterns they make on the window sill. Seeing whose raindrop can fall the fastest.

But

I am me.
I am scared.
I am shy.
I am weak.
I am in pain for feeling a love that I can never express. A crush….
I can do nothing but watch as they claim another. Watch as they tell me all about their life without me in it. Oh I am there..but I am not…there.

I have a crush. A child game at love,

For someone I can not have….

I have a crush….
And I can’t do anything but be happy

Even though …
I
Feel like I am dying inside….
A crush…

Crush…
Whoever thought of such silliness.

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